orioncayge
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Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 770
Trainer Class:
Arena Points: 20
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Post by orioncayge on Nov 8, 2023 13:58:43 GMT 9
Once again Orion found himself perched in the sand, legs wrapped around a basketball sized orange egg half submersed in sand, his body hunched over it. Last time he'd tried to use hot sand he forgot the most vital part about hatching an egg, and that was sitting on it. Well, hens didn't really like sit on them, like cheeks to egg sit, it was more of a huddle thingy to share heat.
Or at least, Orion chose to believe in a world where that was true to justify his current situation.
Sighing, he open his UI and browse through various notifications and messages. A quiet day so far, nobody on yet, nothing to do but try to work out the kinks of hatching Helios. Heated sand seemed to be the most logical choice to him, perhaps he'd just done it wrong the first time. Otherwise he would have to admit that his gut instinct was wrong, and that was the last thing he felt like doing at this particular moment.
Still, it gave him another reason to wander these arid sands in search of secrets lost the sands of time.
An errant ping drew Orion's gaze from the crumpled ruins to his UI, where an alert was telling him Big Bee was online. He would languidly flick his wrist and slap out a quick PM.
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Big Bee
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Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 686
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Bryan Nautilus
OOC Username: Ladybug
Arena Points: 49
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Post by Big Bee on Nov 10, 2023 18:52:01 GMT 9
Orion needed him. He could sense it even before he put on the helmet. Big Bee logged in as fast as humanly possible, maybe even faster! The Worldscreen scanned his eyes and face and neural signal and suddenly he was in the overworld. He stood on a concrete beach.
His UI pinged. It was from Orion. He smiled. It felt good to be needed. And to be right! He tapped out a quick reply.
Leaving Orion something to ponder while he waited, Bee (Hornet?) brought up the world map. A dark orb blossomed on his screen, expanding until it was a whole, floating globe. Area outlines sang in bright colors, and pulsing spots of light shower where his friends were.
There was a bright crimson spot in the middle of the Dune District.
He tapped the nearest fast travel point an there was a pause, then a flicker of color, and then a rush of hot air. His feet crunched on the sand and he looked around. No Orion. He's be nearby though, obviously. He could feel it. To help him feel the exact direction of his bro he brought up the minimap as a semi-transparent overlay, and sent out Maverick, his Rufflet.
"Buzz the tower, Mav!"
"Huh?"
"I said look for Orion!"
"Who?"
"I said fly up high and try to find some guy wearing a bandana and holding an egg."
"What?!"
Big Bee returned Rufflet and started walking towards the red spot on his minimap.
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orioncayge
•
Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 770
Trainer Class:
Arena Points: 20
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Post by orioncayge on Nov 11, 2023 12:35:40 GMT 9
Orion squinted at the text before him, unsure if it was some sort of fucked up Mirage and not actually his UI. Giant Hornet? What the fuck? It was borderline blasphemous, a stab at what was already perfect and needed zero fucking change. It was like Bee had changed the 1.50 Hot Dog in the food court, or messed with the colonels herbs and spices at KFC.
It was worse than new coke.
Taking a deep breath, he steadied himself and then pulled up the virtual keyboard.
Orion shuddered thinking of the many a night spent prone, making offerings and praying at the porcelain throne, invoking every god there was and then some seeking alms for his hubris. Half of the nights he hardly remembered, but the DAYS long hangovers lingered like a crazy ex girlfriend.
After a few moments, Bee appeared like a mirage and began approaching him.
"Yo!" Orion would call out, flagging him down even though he was clearly approaching unprompted. "Moral of the story is you need to coke classic your shit my mans."
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Big Bee
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Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 686
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Bryan Nautilus
OOC Username: Ladybug
Arena Points: 49
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Post by Big Bee on Nov 12, 2023 16:32:44 GMT 9
"Well you see," Big Bee said, breathing hard as he climbed up the sand dune towards Orion, "Coke Classic only worked so well because people hated New Coke. Okay, when I put it like that I see what you're saying. But I still think I'm onto something."
He reached the top of the hill and slumped down. "So, what I guess I'm saying is that you hating the name is a good sign. I gotta get people yearning for that taste of Classic Bee." He nodded, then opened his UI.
"I'm not kidding dude. Until I find the worst possible name and parade it around for at least a few hours I can't switch back. I want people to be happy to see the old name again, not think I'm indecisive or bad at market research."
There was a burst of jungle color as Tropic Thunder his Tropius appeared on the sands. The banaosaur waved its fronds, fanning up a weak sandstorm around Bee. "Whoa! Keep it light and loose, man. I'm trying to escape the desert, not eat it."
"Sorry," said Tropius, slumping a little.
"No sweat, guy. You just don't know your own strength. We'll get you used to using those wings delicately, I promise. That's the New Bee guarantee."
He turned back to Orion. "Or should it be the Classic Bee guarantee? I don't want people to prefer the New Bee."
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orioncayge
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Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 770
Trainer Class:
Arena Points: 20
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Post by orioncayge on Nov 12, 2023 17:35:00 GMT 9
"They didn't even go back to the classic formula, they introduced corn syrup instead of sugar and ruined the whole thing." Orion shook his head. "That's why we only drink the mexican coke bottles Tio Gio has his boys bring in from over the border. It's part of the reason my Uncle's pizzaria is the premier birthday party place, that secret OG coke formula hits DIFFERENT dawg." He would scoop up Hyperion and cradle the egg gently in his arms as he tottered closer to Bee. "But I gotta say, your plan is pretty genius except for one part."
"You see what I mean?" Orion raised an eyebrow to his compatriot. "You're all open for me to...vandalize...your..." He paused, his gaze settling on something past Bee. Lentimas, Never Forget. The words were scrawled with such purpose and meaning. Like they meant something, but what the fuck did they mean? Lentimas? Was that a code? God? Sick ass Italian restaurant with the best pasta ever that closed because they failed health inspection? Could it be a word scramble? Ailments, manliest, melanist, and smaltine all worked if you unscambled it, but he didn't think the vandal was talking about tiny crackers. If you dropped a letter you could get ailment, entails, inmates, laments, mantles, salient, seminal (gross), or saltine.
Crackers again? Maybe it was crackers.
"What the fuck is a Lentimas dude?" He'd nod his head over to graffiti. "I've been seeing all sorts of scrawls like that around here. Most of it's gibberish but some of it smells like plot to me."
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Big Bee
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Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 686
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Bryan Nautilus
OOC Username: Ladybug
Arena Points: 49
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Post by Big Bee on Nov 12, 2023 19:01:16 GMT 9
"What the hell man! That's illegal!" Big Bee said, laughing as he tried to scold Orion. "How would you like it if-" he stopped, eyes gleaming, and then he opened his UI as fast as possible, tying like crazy.
With the japery out of the way, Bee offered to carry one of the eggs as they explored the graffiti. It was everywhere. On chunks of broken wall, on stretches of blasted stone. Every hard surface seemed to have all or part of a scrawl on it. Time is wasting
"What about this? Do you think it's plot or trash?" Bee looked around at some of the other chunks. There were names, some repeating, and numbers too. "'Time is wasting'...Time until what? Until the end of the world? Until the World Event? The only thing in this area related to time is the Broken Sundial. Do you think it's a reference to that?"
He looked around for more time related hints. 54.0194°N 0.5789°W "What do you reckon this is about?"
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orioncayge
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Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 770
Trainer Class:
Arena Points: 20
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Post by orioncayge on Nov 13, 2023 9:42:48 GMT 9
Oh that's how it was going to be, huh?
Sure it stung a bit, but real character assination came at a cost. After the two had mutually destroyed their reputation with anyone who actually read those logs, Orion offered an olive branch and changed his username from Big_Bee to OrionCayge. Cayge_Match had been kinda cringe to begin with, and considering how personal his interactions with people had been recently, doing so through the veneer of a username felt...unsavory.
What happened next was like some sort of post apocolyptic art gallery trip and which the two explored the ruins together, Hyperion was gently nestled in his godfather's arms while Orion had also pulled out Hermes the soon to be zapdos and carried them around. With every one of Bee's proddings Orion would hem and haw.
"Time is wasting seems pretty generic to me, unless we find a clock tower or something around here like...I'm not really sure my guy. The sundial doesn't seem like it's wasting away, but maybe we are on some sort of timer? What do you think Hermes?" he would turn to the egg and give it a little gentle bounce. No response.
Hermes must not like art.
"Now cordinates? Those have to be something yeah? Someone wants us to go see whatever is there, otherwise what's the point of putting it out there? Are those in the games mini map cordinate code or another code?"
His eyes scanned the surrounding area while he pondered, his gaze settling on a ruined wall attached to what looked like it may have once been a pokecenter, but just about everything was ripped to shit and back.Remember Lentimas 11/11 "Oh shit, there's another Lentimas thing, that's gotta up it to either being a 50/50 on plot or a meme yeah?"
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Big Bee
•
Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 686
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Bryan Nautilus
OOC Username: Ladybug
Arena Points: 49
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Post by Big Bee on Nov 13, 2023 15:43:58 GMT 9
Not content with having Orion dual-wielding unborn Pokemon and him only single-wielding, Bee pulled out his own egg. It had a soft, gentle black shell studded with a million stars. "Hyperion, meet your...cousin? I have no idea. God sibling? That sounds pretty cool but is a bit misleading. Whatever. Meet...oh..I don't have a name yet. Not sure if it's a boy or a girl. Anyway you two will be fast friends, I can tell." The eggs looked happy in his arms, but that may have just been wishful thinking.
Bee bounced the two eggs gently as he and Orion walked through the maze of cryptic hints. "Yeah, another Lentimas mention. Never forget. 11/11. Sounds like a disaster on that date. But what? And also why? And also also when? 11/11 is at least geographically unambiguous, but what year. Did they even use the same calendar when they wrote this? Was it like 'on the eleventh day of our eleven day year'." He shook his head, unable to decipher the wild implications of having an annual calendar that was less than a fortnight long.
"Oh! Here's another one!" Lentimas lives on is our hearts "Well...that one is pretty unambiguous, right? Something doesn't need to live on in your heart if it still lives on in the world, does it..." He peeked around the side of the ruins and saw another stretch of wall plastered in weathered graffiti. someone help me "Some of these are pretty relatable."
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orioncayge
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Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 770
Trainer Class:
Arena Points: 20
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Post by orioncayge on Nov 14, 2023 14:39:42 GMT 9
"If you think about it" Orion mused as they trudged onwards. "This sort of thing is FASCINATING from a historical aspect, you know. We're really raiding a motherfuckin lost ark up in this bitch like my boy Indie. On the other hand, this if fucking horrifying to think about on a grander scale. The end of the fucking world shit, and we're moseyin up and down this ho with our unborn kids like it's Disney. Post apocalyptic tourism and all that good shit."
He really shouldn't swear in front of the children, but it wasn't like they could hear him, and it wasn't like he couldn't NOT swear. The word fuck was engraved into his linguistic codex like the indelible stain of a red sock turning all of your white shirts pink. You wouldn't ask Seth McFarlan to write an episode of Family Guy without cutaway gags would you? I mean, you would, but like, he sure as fuck wouldn't oblige you at all.
A gentle hum, and the crackle of static alerted Orion to his sick metal spike earrings that he hadn't attached to his earlobe like a normal human being, he'd affixed them to the silver chain of his dog tags that he wore despite having never served in any wars, it wasn't stolen valor, he just had that dawg in him. The two menacing metal spikes were humming and glowing blue, which either meant goblins were about OR that they were gettin real close to a corruption zone according to the useful tooltip from the item.
"Ayo, hold up." Orion would turn to Bee, adjusting his precious cargo. "Might be best to put the babes to bed, boutta be beatdown o clock in this beach."
His baby blues danced around the horizon, keeping an eye out for any potential threats. Last time they'd been into the thick of it they'd gotten mobbed by all sorts of hellish ghouls and ghastly goons, they last thing he wanted to do was be left for dead here in the sands, and he certainly wasn't trying to mimic the challenge run of carrying a fucking gnome through the whole level just for bragging rights. All three of his eggs went back into his inventory, giving them all smooches and a "Nighty Night Buddy" before turning back to his bro.
"Aight, lets see what this place has ready for us."
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Big Bee
•
Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 686
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Bryan Nautilus
OOC Username: Ladybug
Arena Points: 49
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Post by Big Bee on Nov 15, 2023 9:27:15 GMT 9
"That's what the world is, right? It's Disney without all the PG-13 filtering. Real life has infinite beauty, but it also has melancholy, occasional violence, and words that a kid doesn't understand," Bee mused. "It's just a thin slice of the human experience. In the same way that a dystopian pulls out a lot of the softness in the world, or how Family Guy imagines a world without comedy."
The hum of Orion's earrings were a clear signal that darkness was afoot. Bee handed back Hyperion and kissed his own egg goodnight before slipping it back into his inventory. Unlike Orion he wasn't all fists and fury on a personal basis, so he sent out Jaws, his hyper-muscular Snubbull. "Keep a lookout little guy, okay?"
"You got it, baws."
"!!"
"What is is, baws?"
"Oh I just don't think you've ever talked before." He looked down at the jacked Snubbull, who was grinding on fist into the palm on his other hand. He was also chewing a toothpick. "Yeah...I definitely would have remembered that accent."
"Ay yo sometimes I don't talk a lot," Jaws said, and then went silent.
"Fair enough. Okay guys let's see what's around here."
The trio searched for threats, but the world didn't seem to have any forthcoming. The shambling zombies and snapping jaws of Mistra seemed leagues away as they paradoxically searched for an evil ambush under the blasting heat of the Ostellian sun.
After a few sweaty minutes Big Bee gave up, and took out his frustration on a chunk of broken wall. He kicked the rock with all his might, and it tumbled down a sand dune, coming to a rest beside Jaws, who was resting at the bottom.
"There's nothing here Orion. I mean I'm not doubting Cygnus or anything, but those earrings might be a bit too sensitive. Could they have been picking up radio waves or something? Were you thinking about Mistra when they went off?"
"Ay yo boss!"
"Yeah?"
"This here rock wants a woird with ya."
"...What?"
Jaws climbed back up the dune and dropped the rock at Bee's feet. There was graffiti on one face. YOU KICKED ME
Big Bee frowned. The graffiti shifted. YOU HURT ME
"Oh. I'm sorry. I didn't know, uh, I didn't know you were on a rock."
I AM NOT A ROCK
I AM HISTORY
The piece of rock was small, and even a few scrawled words of graffiti were all it could manage to hold at a time.
YOU HURT TIME
HAPPY?
"No! I told you no! I'm sorry. Can I heal you or something?"
YOU CAN SUFFER
PERISH IN TIME
Ichor dripped from the rock, tangling around Big Bee's arm and binding him to the chunk of ruin. He tried to hurl it, but it was like he was bonded to the stone. "Orion! Help me get this this off!" he shouted.
The sands around them shook, like a beast shaking off slumber, and the ground rose. Sand flowed away from the rising foundations of a long, curved ruin. No an arc. A great boat of stone and jade, once buried beneath the sand but now buoyed back into the light by malice.
The craft floated on top of the shifting dunes, and with the rumble and roar of a thousand trapped souls in the galley, it drifted Northward.
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orioncayge
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Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 770
Trainer Class:
Arena Points: 20
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Post by orioncayge on Nov 16, 2023 16:02:20 GMT 9
"Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me."
Orion had watched what had transpired with equal parts concern, intrigue, and then later absolute horror as the ship rose from the sand carrying Bee along with it. Sand whipped into the air at ferocious speeds, and once again he found himself donning the swimmer goggles, though this time for different effect. This was some genuine Shadow of the Colossus tier shit right here, yes sir. The massive barge barreling from below barely fit in his field of view, and he'd missed a chance to hop on and ride the elevator up.
Shit.
Orion took a running jump off a ramp of cracked concrete and stuck the grab onto a handhold, catching a ride as the ship continued to rise. "You've got to be fucking SHITTING me. I do NOT have the MON for this fuck my life." He would grumble as he worked his way, clambering upwards along the grooves worn into the side by the Sands of Time. Beads of sweat would build along his dusty temple, a byproduct of heat, exertion, and nerves. "Need to hurry up with the triplets so I can just bird up for shit like this. God fuckin damn."
Too bad this wouldn't get him shredded IRL.
"HANG TIGHT THERE BRO! I'M COMING WITH THE BRICK BREAK SPECIAL DON'T YOU WORRY"
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Big Bee
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Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 686
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Bryan Nautilus
OOC Username: Ladybug
Arena Points: 49
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Post by Big Bee on Nov 21, 2023 21:33:47 GMT 9
The ichor burned like injected motor oil. The rising arc shifted and Bee slammed backwards into the jade gunnel. The boat was heading North, and they were leaving Orion behind on the shifting sands. "Ah! Shit! ORION!!!"
There was no guarantee of help on this one, so Bee immediately went to work trying to minimize damage.
"Jaws!"
"Ay yo boss, no needs ta shout. Aym right here."
Bee's arm shook, his muscles clenching and jumping as the ichor tore away at his body layer by layer. "Bite this rock off my arm."
Jaws inspected the ruin fragment. It had grown several dark tentacles and the text read. DO NOT INTERFERE
"It says nots to interfere."
"I know! Because he's trying to infect me! Or poison me! Or eat me from the inside or something. Just get it off."
"I aints no docta, boss."
"I'm not asking for you to take out my appendix! Just pull the rock off!"
"Yo ima need a second opinion before I go removin' anything. I aint no amputater."
Something in Big Bee's arm crunched, and the ruin shifted with a sound like wet gravel. Big Bee grit his teeth against the surge of fresh pain.
"You know what? Fine. I'll sort it out!" He braced himself against the side of the boat and raised his arm.
"Ay yo boss, that may not be a great move, ya see-"
Bee smashed his arm down against the stone deck to try and shatter his assailant, but the fragment of ruin shifted. Arm met stony deck in a striking impression of a skateboarding accident, leaving Bee with about 20% less arm-skin than before. He cradled his shaking arm as the ichor slipped into his dripping arteries.
Orion jumped over the side.
"-ya buddy is almost here."
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orioncayge
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Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 770
Trainer Class:
Arena Points: 20
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Post by orioncayge on Nov 22, 2023 10:06:41 GMT 9
Orion hooked one leg over the side of the deck and heaved his body over, landing with a thud and a roll as he scrambled onto his feet and continued forward towards his friend. This was some Indiana Jones meets some 28 days later crossover cooked up by coked up executives in the creative writing room and frankly Orion was equal parts impressed and annoyed with the scale and sheer exertion it had taken to shadow his way up this colossus.
"I'm comin bud, I'm co-"
CRAKOW
Something fast and bright crashed into the side of the arc like an anti air missile, causing the entire ship to jolt and list side to side sending Orion stumbling to his knees. He looked to his left as the ship listed, and spotted several small dots lining one of the distant dunes. Squinting, he tried to make out their shape, but only got the faintest hint of a twinkle of light before another bolt of something sank into the ships side causing it to list even further.
"Oh fuck we're getting gunned down bud."
Orion forced his way forward towards his friend and took a look at the rock that was currently trying to snap into him like Slim Jim. This was looking like one hell of a pickle, and likely something they couldn't just punch their way out of. Of course, there was only one way to find out. Orion brough his fists up into the air and charged just about all of his fighter powers into his knuckle, letting his fighting spirit take form as he brought it down in double flaming fists.
His knuckles cracked into the stone with a reverberating thud, and he could feel the holt of fingers crunching against floor as the force of his punches traveled up his arms. No broken fingers yet, but he'd scraped the skin clear off his knuckles. His vision filled with flashes of red as his hp dipped, but Orion couldn't care less as he brought his fists down again, this time channeling pure draconic rage as he invoked his player class ability. His vision flashed red, and his teeth clenched tight as he failed to break into the stone again.
He was going to feel this when he woke up.
He brought his fists up once again, and this time channeling a bit of pokemon logic, he brought down a mighty warlock punch as he channeled dark energy into this ghost of the pass, smashing into the deck with extreme force as the ancient granite yielded to his blow. Whilst he hadn't managed to get the stone completely off Bee, he had managed to wrench him free from being anchored to the boat.
"Let's fuckin bail before we go down with the ship, maybe spooky will bust when the rest of his body breaks?"
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Big Bee
•
Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 686
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Bryan Nautilus
OOC Username: Ladybug
Arena Points: 49
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Post by Big Bee on Jan 3, 2024 14:25:04 GMT 9
Bee's arm throbbed with phenomenal pain. It felt like he was having a wrist-to-elbow heart attack. It felt like he's just had every drop of blood in his arm sucked out and replaced with Monster Energy. It felt like his super jacked, superhuman best friend had just some full Smackdown on him and what was left of him was Raw as hell.
The stone tablet clung to his arm, its shadowy tendrils cutting into his flesh. He could feel something cold creeping through his veins, invading the arteries and making its home in his wounded body. "It's inside me! Infecting me or something!" he shouted to Orion, frantic. "Get it out!"
"Ay yo boss, that's a real humdinger ya got there."
"So help me! Bite it off or something!"
"What I look like, a doctor?"
Another bolt hit the side of the craft and it listed drunkenly. Bee grabbed onto the gunnel with his good arm. The ship creaked dangerously as it tilted back to level. "Let's go!" he said, preparing to leap over the side. It was a long way down, and he gulped, feeling the danger in his dry throat. No flying in UNOVR. No goddamn flying in UNOVR! Well maybe they could do the next best thing!
He opened his UI one-handed and equipped Aviator. "Equip Aviator!" he called to Orion, as he swung one leg over the side. "Once we get close to to the ground we can double jump!"
Another bolt hit the underside of the ship and it bucked wildly. A deep, troubling groan marked the breaking of the ship, and a resonant crunch split the air just a second before the whole ship snapped in half across the middle. "Watcha waitin for boss!?" Grandbull said, rushing him.
"A better option," Bee said, cradling his ruined arm. But with the ground breaking apart below him and no other way out, he grit his teeth and jumped.
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orioncayge
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Bandana Guy
Round 2
Posts: 770
Trainer Class:
Arena Points: 20
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Post by orioncayge on Jan 18, 2024 16:47:37 GMT 9
"What in the Looney Toon fuck."
Orion turned to look to his friend, eyes dancing from his sick Bandanna to his sickly arm that was covered in a corrupted concrete cast. They were definitely not in a great position at the moment, and he didn't think going down with the ship was really an option here. Whatever was down there was fucking pissed, whatever was up here was fucking pissed, and really he didn't see many options. He was stuck between a rock and a hard fight, and honestly the throb of his wounded fingers made him think that hitting whatever was down there was going to be a lot easier than hitting whatever was up here. Hell, he hadn't seen any obvious glowing weak spots or bulbous growths of oozing black puss, maybe he was missing the mcguffin to open the way.
Either way.
"I'll be right behind ya bud!" Orion called out, urging Bee to bail first. Perhaps distance from their foe would provide alms for his ally's ailing arm. One Bee had bounced, bound for below, Orion would be soon to follow. Fiddling with his UI, he jumped right as he swapped classes and dove for the dunes. His eyes scanned the horizon as more blasts were popped of from a distance, still unable to discern the destroyers of their dune demon. Anyone who'd ever heard of the enemy of their enemy being their friend had clearly never dealt with like, WWII politics, and thus Orion was weary of whatever was watching over them.
Freefalling, Orion would take a moment to flip onto his back and take in a deep breath, reading the good ole moonlight special. Some things just didn't change, Miyazaki couldn't help putting the moonlight sword and poison swamps into his game, Gamefreak couldn't optimize their code, and Orion would Moongeist beam corruption monsters. He let his anger and outrage pour out of his lips like a searing roar, smashing into the arc and carving into the crumbling stone. Satisfied that he'd managed to get at least one good hit in, he would flip back over and watch as the sand was uncomfortably close to smashing into his face.
Oh fuck.
With feet to spare, Orion managed to activate his double jump and his feet were spared. Flipping stylishly into the air, Orion managed to land on his feet and slide down the far side of dune, scanning the surrounding area for his bro who had bailed before.
"BEE!" He howled. "YOU OKAY BUD!?!"
A piece of debris landed uncomfortably close, and as Orion looked back up he realized that it was about to be raining massive chunks of corrupted concrete if they didn't get the fuck out of dodge real lickity split.
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