[ti]event[/ti]Ol' Blarney's Valentine's Hookup!

CAN YOU FILLET THE LOVE TONIGHT?!

All the catches are lined up along the Beta Island dock. A row of more than fifty potential brides, which Blarney eyes like a show-judge at some aquatic dog show. A dogfish show, perhaps.

"They say there are always more fish in the sea," Blarney says, scratching his chin, which sports a beard like a splash of seafoam, "but with a haul like this I'm not so sure anymore!" He laughs. A sound like creaking dock-boards and crashing waves.

Blarney walks the length of the dock twice, getting the measure of the contestants before he starts in earnest. He makes his way down the line, matching species and aesthetic. With eyes honed from decades in the sea, stream, and lake, he takes in every frill, fin, and scale. Like he's swiping on Finder, most of the fish are declined on sight. Only the best will do.

He squints critically at a Frillish. Could he picture those tentacles making him dinner after a long night out at sea? He shakes his head and presses a sticker to the side of the glass tank. RELEASE He moves on to the next, leaving the scent of lemon and defeat thick in the air.

There's a Krabby paging through a waterproof copy of Moby Dick. A Krabby? Reading? RELEASE

Another Frillish. This one so large that its tentacles flop over the sides of the tank. A veritable Kraken that sets Blarney's heart slamming like the bang of oars against their locks. "Tell me about yeself, lass."

"Oim jus' a yung, pre''y fing, oo luvs wawks on da beech, innit?"

"Sweet mother of pearl," Blarney swears, his face slackening like a mainsail on a windless night. RELEASE

Near the end of the line is a shy little Clamperl, but Blarney is immediately put off by the horrid cyan color of its shell. "Sorry. Ye would clash with me decor. I may be a fisherman, but I ain't a savage." RELEASE

Only ten fish make it to round two.

SPOILER: Click to show

{Top Ten}
SPORTY
-Average Carbo-Loaded Arrokuda
-Small Stretchy Poliwag

POSH
-Teensy Heirloom Goldeen
-Average Gucci Corsola
-Humungo Cockney Frillish

BABY
-Family-Sized Full-Time Mantyke
-Giant Full-Time Azurill

GINGER
-Giant Boxy Corphish
-Teensy Cyan Corphish

SCARY
-Mini Committed Basculin

Next is the most crucial part of any date: the weigh-in.

Blarney's piercing eyes can size a fish at fifty feet, but a level of officiality is required for this tiebreaker. Three independently chosen, anonymous fisherman perform a double-blind weighing of the finalists.

From behind the curtain a particularly weighty specimen makes the scales creak and complain.

"Aye, a fine and hefty set of brides." Blarney says. "Well above the legal catching weight."

Half the qualifying fish are sent home, leaving only the cream of the carp.

WINNERS

Blarney slips a glittering, golden band onto the fin of the Average Carbo-Loaded Arrokuda. "There be none more Sporty than thee. Yer speed. Yer clear preparation for a marathon. It's not been in vain. I see ye for who ye really are."

Big Bee and orioncayge receive 200 BYTES for SPORTY!

"And ye'll never convince me ye ain't a darned sea-bound princess!" Blarney says, addressing the Average Gucci Corsola as he puts the ring on one of her coral spines.

Domino and Kazuki receive 200 BYTES for POSH!

Next is the cutest of the winners. "Most would pass ye' over. Some would even say ye're not a fish at all! Some sort of cartilaginous ray, or a skate perhaps. But that doesn't matter to me! Yer born of the ocean, and that's good enough for this old soul." Blarney gently places the ring on the antennae of the Family-Sized Full-Time Mantyke. Family-sized indeed.

Muin and Cleo receive 200 BYTES for BABY!

"Yer a gorgeous color! Remind me of me hair, when I was but a young fry." Blarney grins, flashing a gold tooth. He gives a ring to the Giant Boxy Corphish.

Big Bee and orioncayge receive 200 BYTES for GINGER!

Blarney's approaches his fifth bride warily. He reaches out and puts the ring next to the Mini Committed Basculin. As he does he cracks a grin. "It's a breath of fresh air fearin' a fish. Usually it's the other way 'round."

Tuesday and Silvermoon receive 200 BYTES for SCARY!

Later...

Ol' Blarney gazes out at the ocean, his crinkly eyes wet with tears. The event has long since ended, the winners picked and rewarded, and the shadows are getting long. "I never...I never imagined that ye would care about an old Blarnacle like myself, much less love me..." Five large fish tanks sit on the beach beside him, each holding one of his beautiful brides.

They look happy together. This family of six.

"I'm sorry me pearls," Blarney says, as gets down on one knee. "I was a fool, only thinking about me own happiness. Ye know what they say. If ye love someone, let them go."

He gently lowers each of his wives into the cool waters of the sea. The waves lap over his hands, and in a splash of fins they each disappear back into the wild.

Were they truly his? Would they ever be? Only time, and tides, would tell.

The Brides of Blarney have returned to the sea.
Arrokuda, Basculin, Corsola, Corphish, and Mantyke
can now be caught through fishing!

We have reached the end of Ol' Blarney's Valentines Hookup! Thank you to everyone who participated!

ANY CHARACTER who participated in the event may claim one of their catches through General Mod Requests.

Please note that all adjectives (Moomin, Christmas, etc) and size will be reset to default!

Lucky Guy Celastrina Nestlewood Verai Yggy Br00ks Morgana Riddle manish Genesis Sarah Lee Laguna Zac Ramsay