"Oh shit. Oh this is the one. Orion is going to lose his mind. He loves birds and monsters and all that cool stuff!" Big Bee said, yanking off a strip of paper and cramming it in his inventory.

Yo! Some people in Briarbane are looking for a secret bird or something.
That sounds weird, but the poster looks way crazier. It's not just birdwatchers. Probably.
I'm on my way to their base now. Meet me there!
Big Bee has started sharing his location

Bee sent the message and inspected the poster further. Concrete details were few and far between. They just wanted...a bird. Any bird? A specific bird? Who knows. The poster certainly didn't have any clues aside from blurry polaroids.

There was only one way to find out.

He headed for the location on the paper, assuming that Orion would meet him there. It was in a quiet suburban street, filled with simple gothic houses with black picket fences, nothing odd going on here. The telephone poles along the side of the street had more of the same wanted posters stapled to them. Some were updated, some weren't, but all kept pointing to number 225.

He looked up at the house, with its wooden shutters and tasteful gargoyles. "Looks like a normal house!" he said, knocking on the front door.

THWAP
THUNK
THWAP

Orion heaved the axe back one more time as he worked at carving his cryptic coffin from the bed of roots it was nestled in.  A task easier said than done, and last he checked there weren't any chainsaw pokemon, so he was busy playing Paul Bunion up his crypt when Bee's messages came through.  He squinted at the words for a moment.  Birds?  What?  Still, he was never one to turn down a good time, birds, bros, or babes it didn't matter to him.  Still, as he watched Bee's dot on the map start moving he got the succinct notion that if Bee had picked up some sort of quest he would also need to start wherever his bro was and then work his way to the base.  A couple quick menu clicks and he was on his way fast traveling to Briarbane.

...

"What the fuuuuuck"  Orion droned as he looked at the poster in front of him.  It looked like, no, it was some cryptid big foot hunting derangedness at its finest.  The polaroid pictures were fuzzy and grainy, forcing him to squint as he engaged in the dark souls of who's that pokemon.  He would reach up and tear off one of the strips for himself, claiming his place as a premier cryptozoologist and then followed in the dusty footprints of his bro, catching up to Bee outside the house.

"You ready to Bird up Buddy?"  Orion would ask clapping him on the shoulder.  "Wonder who's gonna rise to the occasion.  Shit like this always puts you in contact with all sorts of different players."

Kazuki was not the best at messaging. Not only was he irritable — meaning notifications were mostly shut off — but he was distractible, which meant he had about 50 unread messages in his inbox months overdue and yet still had the audacity to bitch when he’s left on read.

But when ozone messages, the response is instantaneous.

Kazuki said:

I don’t know what kinda shitty bird that is

Kazuki said:

But I’m going to roast and serve it on a plate

Kazuki said:

After I roast and serve your ass

Kazuki said:

YOU. ARE. ON.

Kazuki said:

BITCH

He yanked open Ozone’s profile — which he only had access to because he’s on his list for fight reasons and promptly hit fast travel, arriving at the heart of Briarbane in a flashbang.

And of course, the lights only accentuated the scales on Ozone’s gaudy avatar, making it hilariously easy to spot him. Who would even play as a dragon?

(Nevermind the fact the man he’s dating was part cat, and one of his closest friends in this game had every cosmetic slider ramped to 11.)

“Fancy bastard,” he said, a greeting in some language. “Is this it?”

There were already a couple of people around, grouping up or trying to figure out what to do, each with little strips of paper. It seemed to come from a poster mounted on the haphazard scrapbook they call a Wanted Board, Kazuki raising a brow as he inspects.

“Looks like something my roommate made when they got addicted to Pretty Little Liars.” Rip. “This will be easy.”

He grimaced, looking around. “Better not be any cops here, though.” He hadn’t returned to Briarbane in a long time, not since the prison break. His chances banked on post-update memory loss.

As players knock on the door to the house, whether they be alone, in groups, or some possible third state of being, they'd find silence awaiting them for a good half minute no matter how much knocking was done.

To the perceptive, it was almost odd. Like Bird Pokemon in the neighborhood were watching you.

Eventually, a little slit in the door opens up, like a plank just removed from the wood and large eyes poke out from behind the door.

"Good, you're here." They'd speak with no explanation, a desperate tone to their voice. "We need evidence. You trainers like rewards. We got rewards."

A paper would suddenly be slid down from underneath the doorway to the outside, a list of some basic examples of evidence they might need. "Help us find proof of the rare, elusive, and oh-so generous bird, and you'll be honorary members of the Bird Finder's Club. But please, be quick! The next club meeting is tomorrow and we can't waste a single second. Not if we want anyone to ever take us seriously."

The slit would be closed right away, leaving players only with the instructions and guidance from the papers. A few mumbled words could be heard from behind. Something about never being taken seriously by the professors?

Below are known forms of evidence. More may be yet to be discovered. Please share any and all evidence found that may be related to the elusive bird.

Eyewitness accounts. Blurry photographs. Mysterious footprints. Audio Recordings of their call. Signs of habitation. Large red and white feathers. Overwhelming presence of gifts. Fresh food in mysterious places.

Additonal information:
This bird likes cold places, high altitudes, and uses food as both gifts and a weapon.
It is omnivorous, including bug Pokémon.
It is said some of them never sleep and thus are hard to ever find.

Please place all evidence within the empty fridge inside 345 Dreadstone Alley, Apartment B. The key will be inside the birdhouse.

She was late, late late! Running so late! First Mom spotted her running by, and just had to have her taste her latest pie. Delicious, but she had no time! She had just enough time to pop off to the stores for some Cryptid Hunting supplies, decked out in a very silly green camouflage vest that totally contrasted with the rest of her outfit. Unfortunately, the only other camouflage they had left was cowboy hats, and she wasn't about to wear something like that. She'd look like all the idiots she went to highschool with who thought they were "real country" despite living in the middle of a big city.

Very shortly after the paper had been slid out and the door's slit shut, Laguna would have finally arrived right outside the place, catching up to orioncayge and Big Bee . "Oh! Hey guys," She held up her own little slip of paper, a wide grin on her face. Of course, she had to pause to finally catch her breath after running and sliding all the way here. "I see neither of you two could resist the call of blurry birds either, huh?"

"Did I miss the meeting?" She'd raise her eyebrows, glancing down at the paper with a curious look on her face. "Nevermind, you can fill me in on the way! Where we dropping, boys?" She'd pull out a small camera she had grabbed on the way here from a local store, old disposable film and all.

Laguna honestly didn't spend much time in the Surge Steppes, it was still a pretty foreign place to her. She didn't really ever imagine climbing the massive spires, but she had to admit it was quite enjoyable. She just laughed, the freezing cold metal not affecting her Freezer body at all.

Even still, the Yanma swarming all around were certainly annoying. Her Cryogonal, Sir Hail, floated right behind her back and protected her from the swarming mass. With a sudden Rapid Spin, his icy chains smacked many a Yanma that fell down below.

"You see the bird?" Laguna immediately craned her neck up high atop the spire, seeing a very fuzzy figure at the top. Grabbing her cheesy disposable camera, she immediately began to pounce forwards. Pushing through the swarm and attempting to lead the way, a Sunsteel Strike would have an incredibly warm heat radiating off her body, keeping the Yanma at bay as she suddenly flung forwards like a miniature rocket.

"I'll get a picture!" Laguna shouted, only to slam face first into a massive cloud of Yanma right in her face. "G-gah! Move bugs! You're gonna make me waste my film! I only got so few shots! Do you have any idea how expensive film is these days?"

Sure enough, she narrowed her eyes and desperately attempted to snap a picture before falling back down. Her dedicated Crygonal swiftly caught up to her, his icy chains wrapping her waist and pressing her against the spire again. "Careful, my good lady. This swarming mass is a menace to much of pleasant society."

"Yeah, I can tell, hah. I just only hope that image develops okay."

AlPgth8f1-20

It would be just his luck that another bastard would arrive on the scene; a friend of ozone’s, of course. And somehow this one was even more of a eyesore, decked head to toe in red and black.

“Yeah, and yours is doing you a lot of favors. How was the Hot Topic bargain bin?” The only man allowed to size up his chest was absent; he was not taking it from a newcomer.

But 『Red Velvet』 plucked a strip for himself and the crowd moved to the house where an unsuspicious figure peeked at them through a slat in the door. The inevitable death by academic disembowelment of the Bird Finder’s Club didn’t matter; what piqued his ears was the mention of a reward.

The players dispersed. Whispers arose as people brainstormed for how to catch the uncatchable—some going as far as the Alps to capture the elusive, exclusive bird.

But fuck the Alps.

This was a bird. Birds were dumb. And if the thing was as quick and unpredictable as the rumors say, Kazuki figured he could probably catch anywhere. He opened his PC box and squinted. He intended to employ his mother’s tactic for capturing a rabid child who refused to stop terrorizing squirrels: nailing bait to a tree and dragging the brat home by the ankles. Except instead of bacon, he’d use bugs.

He only had one bug in his inventory, and it was not going to fit in any standard rope or box trap. And it needed to be immobilized, else it would burrow into the earth, never to be seen again.

The sound of construction filled the air. Kazuki offered no explanations and no certification; he nabbed spare parts of scrap steel and wood wherever he could find, cobbling together the parts with the diligence of a kindergartner making macaroni art.

“There! Finally done.” He stepped back, patting dust off his hands. “Now all that’s left is waiting ‘till dark for the bird to bite.”

The bug had been attached to a tree upright, all six of its wagging, punchy arms held either side of its body by metal straps.

Kazuki had crucified an Orthworm.

xEMretgI1-20

Time passed. Kazuki lounged on a tree stump, carving some kind of bird stake in preparation when one of the townsfolk came out asking about his little ‘art exhibit’. Specifically, where he obtained the wood—the wood pieces that looked an awful lot like the timber they were saving for winter.

The response, as expected, was Kazuki telling them to fuck off, and instigating a brawl that drew the attention of a patrolling officer who hurried over on his mudsdale to break up the fight.

As the commotion grew, only one being remained untouched: watching from above, complacent with its place in life, heart bare to the world—Orthworm forgave. Kazuki didn't notice the little red blur that would leave Orthworm a small treat it would munch on as it saw the carnage unfold.

Red Vel looked at Kazuki, especially as he began his… arts ‘n crafts project. “Yeeeep,” He agreed. “Bro, I’ll give you the clickbaity-est title I can.” Jokes aside… This was the person Tarou was in love with? A guy who picks fights and-

Crucifies a worm?

Red Velvet crossed his arms, looking up at the thing. Kazuki was… making himself a stake (was the bird supposed to be a vampire?). This was absolutely going sideways.

Kazuki got himself in a fist-fight with the law, ozone had scampered off to tag something, and Red? Well, he decided to use his braincells, since no one else was.

“Hmm…” The shape of the bird on the paper… that was a Delibird (Thank you, countless episodes of Pokemon and thus doubly-countless who’s-that-pokemon endcards). In the canon games, they were exclusive to snowy-slash–icy areas, and… um, they sucked. 330 base stats, two levelup moves-

Smogon absolutely hated it, but this wasn’t a mainline game, and the (stat) points don’t matter.

All that said, maybe the fuckers going to the Alps had a point.

Red Vel cast his eyes to Oz, who… had stolen a christmas tree (or- whatever the pokemon equivilant was. Presuming there was no Orthworm Jesus figure), and was painting it garish colors. For the bird.

Gods, he needed to play this game more often. This was bonkers.

Red Velvet closed his eyes in thought. This was going off the rails- so he had to think just as wild. What was the thing least likely to work?

It was picking up Tango for all of one minute, until the torchic had shed some feathers, and then it was swiping one of Oz’s four millionty cans of spray paint.

Wham, bam, thank you ma’am, red feathers.

Red Vel gracelessly tossed them around the scene of the crime. “There we go- bona fide evidence.”

CVKmGm4X1-20