Word in the office was that some big boss man was wandering around the office asking questions and Felicia wanted literally nothing to do with that. She knew how these things went, they would talk and talk and talk and give lots of “ideas” that were either things Felicia pitched weeks ago or things that were so outside the realm of functional that she would want to bash her face into a wall. And he was told not to do that anymore. So she did the only logical choice: she dipped to go test things in UNOVR. Technically still her job and she didn’t have to deal with any stuffy corporate nerds trying to talk to her. Win win.

Olga found herself walking around the Steppes. She didn’t totally remember logging off here, but whatever, it didn’t totally matter what she did as long as it was in the game. Olga took a moment to paw through her inventory before bringing out the recently caught Dewpider. Might as well see what the little bug could do. “Out” she grumbled and saw the little bug appear in a flash. She scooped up the Dewpider and started to make her way through the Steppes. There was a corner of the map she wanted to go poke around in.

There was only so much damage a large buff woman could do against an attacking bird. And that amount of damage is a lot. Dewpider desperately hid in her hair and she cold clocked Rufflet as it dived. Did it hurt? Sure, she had her pain threshold on realistic for a reason (a bet with one of the devs) but she wasn’t about to let that stop her.

Rufflet stumbled away slightly dazed but quickly ruffled its feathers and squared off again.

“Olga crush bird between thighs.” She flexed her impressive thigh muscles at the same time to really drive home the point.

This did cause Rufflet to pause. That was a hell of a threat and Olga was 100% willing to do it.

But unfortunately for Rufflet, its programming demanded it continue to attack. And fortunately for Olga, her desire to cause physical damage to things around her meant that she once again got to raise her fists and try to land another punch to the bird.

Dewpider, for its part, just tried its best to hang onto Olga’s shoulder for all that he was worth. Clearly it was not necessarily needed for this battle.


1d100

Olga was willing to tolerate the Rufflet when she was just avoiding work that involved talking to weird corporate bigwig, but now that there was actually something for her to work on that was interesting? Nah, she didn’t have time to deal with these shenanigans anymore. “Stay down,” she grumbled and turned back to filling out the full report.

As much as she liked to complain about the gross amount of emails she had to send each day, she really did enjoy actually writing up bug reports. Outside of the betting and extortion of her coworkers it was her favorite part of work. Well, that and working in the background to destroy every piece of coding that made Quacxee. That menace (derogatory) deserved a horrifying death. But outside of that, anytime she got to drag the dev team was a good time.

Rufflet, clearly a horrible creation designed by the devs with the thought of annoying her in mind, didn’t quite get the memo and once again stood up to fight her. There was a part of her that was amused by the tenacity. But there was a much larger part of her that was trying to work and also ignoring the terrified scuttling of a Dewpider running around her body. Really she didn’t even know why she bothered to send out the pokemon in the first place. She was perfectly capable of handling this on her own.

She let out a loud sigh and saved her report. “Look, Olga clearly crush tiny bird. Why still fight? Let Olga win.” Despite her attempts, though, Rufflet still looked very set on attacking.

“Fine. Olga teach lesson. Olga crush bird.” This time Olga charged Rufflet. She was going to punt the bird into another tree. Maybe she’ll find another bug, or maybe she’ll just release some pent up aggression. Either way she wins.

Unfortunately for her, Olga was a very large object and Rufflet was very small. Her charging was more of a stampede and sure, she trampled over Rufflet, but she didn’t quite have the coordination to stop herself before she slammed into the glowing tree. There was a mildly upsetting crunch as her shoulder made contact and she blacked out.

Felicia could feel her eye twitch as she was faced with the ‘You Whited Out. Respawn at nearest Shrine?’ screen. Fine. She would heal whatever damage happened to her avatar and then go back and finish off the dumb bird. Felicia angrily selected the respawn option and waited for the game to load up again.