Bergamot Gristleborg
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Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Aug 30, 2024 10:04:42 GMT 9
Malice became tangible for the first time in the kitchen as the parade of constellations feasted. Blood splattered alongside stardust, and the warm, wafting smells of freshly-cooked dishes took on a metallic tang.
Morgana approached the spirits holding stones, holding out her hand. "Give," she ordered, and the weight of the inkstone settled comfortably into her palm. Stinging pain erupted across her forearm as cursive words drew themselves across her skin, leaving it red and irritated.
Speak only in rhyme.
"I can do that, piece of pat," Bergamot said. She rubbed the mark, lingering a little longer than she had to, then moved on to Spin the Wheel.
When it finally stopped, Bergamot stood looking at her theme prompt. For the first time, her usual smug, airy confidence seemed to waver.
FLOWERS
Flowers. Flowers… a little tame, wasn't it? She eyed the 'vermin' and 'salmon migration' options enviously. Should she re-spin? Or spend the extra points to choose? No… she needed everything she could get if she was going to sabotage all the other players down the line. Sacrifices had to be made!
Morgana checked her Pokemon Box, almost as a desperate measure. She stopped. Her eyes widened. Then she began to laugh. "Oh…ho…ho!" They thought she only had water-types, hmm? They thought she wouldn't have a Pokemon with flowers?! That she, Bergamot the Swimmer, wouldn't have one grass-type?
It happened she had exactly one grass type.
I'll show them!
"Now before we're too far gone, I have the perfect Pokemon! A grass-type much to my delight Clad in shades of red and white!"
A Kartana materialized! Joy of joys!
…Kartana did not like being out of Ostellia!
"James! Stop that immediately!" Bergamot ordered, then quickly ad-libbed "Or I'll be forced to get weedy with thee!" Sigh. She dodged a flurry of papery blows, hiking up her skirts and running around the other side of the kitchen counter to put some obstacles between herself and the out-of-control Ultra Beast. "James, what are you doing?! Everyone's booing!" They weren't yet, but would be soon.
James the Kartana shuddered. Its papery arms folded and unfolded madly, like an invisible child was correcting their work. Long, horrible ripping sounds came from it, then it lunged, tearing apart an unused mango like a living blender. Well this isn't good.
It was too late to send out another Pokemon— she'd already locked this one in for the round. She needed another out. "You, show me your stone, lest I be undöne!" Bergamot seized a passing spirit. This one had two stones—one in each hand. This time Morgana read the tooltips before accepting.
Trashcan Tattoo: You can only cook with scraps. Use food discarded from other player's dishes.
Hand Tattoo: You switch hands with your Pokemon.
That was it!
Morgana rolled away as Kartana's blades came slashing down behind her, grabbing both stones out of the spirit's hands. She crawled under one of the prep tables, gritting her teeth as the curses worked their magic
First, all her ingredients from the pantry—broccoli, rose water, anything floral that would have massively helped her in the next round— dissolved into ash. No matter! Kartana's grassy, grassy power would make up for it, Bergamot was sure!
Second, the deadly paper blades which had been so threatening before vanished, appearing on Morgana's wrists instead. In turn, her own dainty human hands appeared on the origami alien.
"I win, I win! So it begins!" Morgana said, crawling back out from under the table and holding up her new hands to examine them. She now had a pair of knives perfect for slicing and dicing ingredients, while Kartana only had weak, human digits. "Ow! Stop that right now!" She ducked as the Kartana shot past her erratically, slapping at her with its new fleshy protrusions.
Now she just had to cook.
How much time was left on the timer?
Morgana slashed the hem of her dress with her knife hands, tearing off the bottom third so her movements wouldn't be hindered, and threw the wad of cloth at James to tangle him up while she was scrounging. "Out of my way, baby gay," she told her friend(?) Ruby , using her elbows to steal a pinch of sunflower seeds, then fled onwards to Buzzster Hooperham 's station. "Give me those sunions, Uncle Zac, else I'll call you weird and wack!"
No time. Bergamot rushed back to her station like a wounded battle princess, trailing scraps of fabric and droplets of blood. She threw the seeds down under a UV lamp, managing to fit her origami-hands under the trigger of a spray bottle to mist them, then turned her attention to the green sunions.
Zac had used about half of them already for his dish, but there might still be a way to restore them. "Argh! Go somewhere far!!" She fended off another slapping contest from Kartana, desperately searching through the appliances. Food processor, stand mixer, drill press, welding iron, time turner…
"It's not a Harry Potter reference, Alliteration's just my preference! Turn back time and bulb re-grow, Bring me back a dish to show!"
Green sunions were the stem of the sunion plant, but the part beneath was what Morgana wanted. She watched, entranced, as the machine turned back time on the vegetable scraps. The green sunions lengthened, missing pieces returning, until the shallot itself reappeared at the end of the stalk. "Stop! Stop! This one's ready! Now I must once more be petty…"
She checked on her microgreens, which were growing well from the sunflower seeds, then hurried back over to Buzzster Hooperham 's station. "I saw that you had Tauros butter— give me some, or I shall shudder!!"
Slippery substance intact, she made one more stop.
"I'm here for your buns, Orion Cayge Baked with all your wit and rage And if they're spoken for, too bad!! I'll point my knife-arms at your blad."
Morgana made a half-jab towards orioncayge's pelvis for clarity (or the rhyme wouldn't make sense), then speared his extra hamburger buns on one Kartana-hand and ran away again.
Plop. Buns in the time machine. She cranked up the power, watching the bread shift and reverse, turning back into its original components. This took careful timing: she didn't want it to go all the way back to wheat. Just flour.
As if realizing its new hands were less than effective, James the Kartana was now shooting Razor Leaf all around Morgana's station. Pity the fool trying to take her universe scraps— it was a leafy danger zone at the moment. Her dress was being torn to ribbons.
Almost done…
DING! Bergamot pulled out her new flour, scraping it out of the machine and off of the counter with her straightedge-hands. She'd sliced up the sunion bulb in a complex grid pattern, making sure to leave the root intact for structural stability, and now she rolled it in the flour before lowering it into a sizzling pan of melted Tauros Butter. Hopefully that's how you bread things. She couldn't imagine any other way to do it.
…The plate looked empty. She needed a salad. Didn't Morpheus have some apple vinaigrette? Bergamot appeared at his station like an orphan to beg for scraps, clad now in little more than torn blue rags. "For this boon, you have my blessing! Lend me thus some salad dressing!"
She pulled her net out of her inventory, braced it between teeth and elbow, and ran around her station for a time, catching Razor Leafs like butterflies. Chunks of her hair went flying, scissored off by passing leaves. "Got you! Just a few will do," she exclaimed triumphantly, standing on top of one of the counters as she leapt to net a whirling green sickle. She was sure they were edible—that was the whole point of having a grass type.
At last, it was time to present to the judges.
"From the top down: it's a flower! Bursting bright with solar power! I present: my BLOOMIN' SUNION But that's not all, that's only one in! Below you'll see sharp botany, Sprinkled thick with microgreens! Sunflower sprouts cast shining rays Drizzled with some apple glaze."
She looked absolutely insane. The dish, thankfully, looked decent (she couldn't speak for taste). The sunion had turned bright green rather than golden brown upon being cooked, but it emitted a faint sunlight from somewhere deep between its cut 'petals.' Bergamot had served the dish with the Bloomin' Sunion on top and the mixed greens below, resembling a child's drawing of a simplified flower.
She had one more thing to say. It was time to collect her prize.
"Chanda Mama, grant me thus A prize for effort, if you must I gave you my name, once before Once more all's fair in food, and war This Riddle's sure to win the bout, Morgana's yours, don't wear it out. Or if you want my Other Name, From worlds beyond this cooking game It's Chryssa G, feel free to brag Now, golden tongue! It's mine to wag!"
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Bergamot Gristleborg
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Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Aug 28, 2024 16:19:27 GMT 9
#s://file~garden/ZaK6ZBFYS2j2rOD5/Characters/muir~png Morgana reached out, a strange expression on her face.
She stopped, fingers just short of brushing the midnight shell. Indigo swirls of cosmic gas seemed to shift across its surface like passing clouds, as if it could sense the danger.
What was she doing?
What did she want to do?
End this.
The thought flickered like a distant lightning bolt. Intrusive, unwanted. Thunder followed, rumbling, whispering. Hypocrisy. Who are you to play Mother or God? Who are you to determine whether another life comes into being? For what purpose? For leisure? For self-image? For nostalgia? It wasn't enough. No reason was enough. No reason was ever good enough, would ever justify the cruelty of inflicting existence upon another creature.
Poor, wretched thing.
"I changed my mind. Let's kill it," said Morgana.
Senga hefted her hammer, interested.
"No, I changed my mind again. We can't kill it," said Morgana.
Senga lowered her hammer, disappointed.
The villainess paced around the castle room. The furniture items here were all familiar— they resembled those Chryssa had at home, in her own bedroom, in her own universe. They were far too low for her here. They were for someone much shorter, someone normally seated, someone with no need for rugs or carpeting because they would get caught on wheels; someone who spent their days watching the sky for signs, polishing silver.
"Muir, I need you."
A humanoid figure appeared as if stepping out of thin air. It was a woman—older than Morgana, perhaps in her late thirties, clad in breastplate and tabard with tassels on the sleeves. She had a thin, steely look, and bore a filigree blade at one side. Once, she had been a Honedge— Bergamot supposed she still was, save for the Noble Seal which gave her the illusion of human form.
<You let me go.>
"And you came back. I knew you'd be here," Bergamot said. She was remembering things, slowly. Things she shouldn't have been able to know. Things from other worlds, other lives, other pasts. Things reflected in the eyes of serpents, things spoken beyond iron doors. She had made someone a promise. She had left someone behind. "I left you here, didn't I? I… forgot." Had she been to the Dream World before? She must have, to find her own Pokemon here. No, not a Pokemon.
Not exactly.
"I need your help. I need to know what to do with this egg."
Muir looked at her, blue-eyed, unblinking.
"I've been trying to hatch it this whole time," Bergamot said, beginning to pace again. "Exposing it to starlight, bringing it to the Precipice Shrine. It must be close to hatching. If I tried just one more thing, I'm sure that would do it."
<You were planning the last step, then.>
"Oh, yes, I was going to do a transmutation." The girl's hand moved in the air, selecting something in her UI. The grayness in her gaze receded. "I have this new power called Alchemist—it's the Midas Touch, essentially. It transforms nonliving things into gold. I thought it would be fitting for Cosmog, since Solgaleo is an alchemical symbol."
<But an egg is not nonliving.>
Morgana turned.
"Are you sure about that?"
Her expression was masked. Delicately, like removing dead petals from a blossom, she peeled away one of her white gloves. "If it isn't, it dies," she said softly. "If it is, it may someday come to live."
Muir began to move, circling around the bed. Clear, measured, military strides. Bergamot matched her pace, circling the opposite side. <You have a theory,> the woman said, clipped. It was not a question. <Tell me.>
"Oh, it's simple enough. What has never lived cannot be killed." Bergamot's—no, Chryssa's eyes narrowed. Fervent. Fanatical. "It's the only way out of a one-way bargain. An egg is the perfect state—the perfect being. The Egg is the World. The Egg is God."
<You're losing yourself. Remember your choice. Remember the serpent.>
The girl blinked. She wet her lips with her tongue. The memory was faint, but important. "I did choose, didn't I? What did that path represent again? Choosing my reality for myself?"
<Perhaps.>
"So I can choose this reality, too."
<This is the Dream World. There is nowhere better.>
It was a difficult pill to swallow; the idea that you chose your own reality. It was defined by your decisions, your thoughts, your perspective. If she chose to be radical, to be justified, to use the Cosmog Egg in her own cosmic war against the Creator, it would become real. If she chose to relent, to relax, to give the unborn Pokemon a chance to find its own brilliance even in a world that sought to crush it, that would become real too.
Morgana thought carefully.
Then she reached out— purposeful, powerful— and touched the egg.
Nothing happened.
"You were right," said Morgana, taking her hand away. She pulled her glove back on, averting her eyes. "It's alive after all. Don't get me wrong—" the girl looked up, narrowing her eyes, "—I could still kill it. But I won't. I shan't," she corrected herself. Something was subtly changing in her. Changing back.
<Danger narrowly averted,> said Muir. <A fortunate soul indeed.>
There was no alchemy performed that night. In the back of her mind, Bergamot had decided not to take that final step. She could have done something less drastic—transmuted a piece of the nest, perhaps, or the page of a book— but she didn't. She would not be the one to propel the unborn Cosmog into UNOVR, or else condemn it. She would leave that final piece in the hands of God, or the gamemakers, or perhaps the game itself.
"Live," she said, counting the stars on the midnight shell with a golden fingertip, "Don't live."
"Live."
"Don't live."
Live…
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Bergamot Gristleborg
•
Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Aug 28, 2024 13:38:25 GMT 9
#s://a~l3n~co/i/4IuJtM~png #s://a~l3n~co/i/4IuJtM~png She woke, as if from a dream.
What happened…?
Feelings. She was holding something tight to her chest—the egg. Yes, that's right. She'd been taking it somewhere. Somewhere important.
Morgana stretched, setting the egg off to the side of the bed, then opened her eyes.
A rush of disorienting deja-vu crashed over her. She was in a bed. Who was she? Bergamot or Chryssa? There were only two times Chryssa Glasgow woke up suddenly in bed. One was after a Deep Dive (or, more rarely, actual sleep), the other was when she'd been taken to the ER.
She'd woken up in a hospital bed more times than she could count.
A shudder ran through her as she gripped her own shoulders, fingers biting bruises through her shirt, then looked down at her arms. She loosened her grip, holding her hands up in front of her face. White gloves.
She was still Morgana.
…Of course she was. Bergamot was the one with the egg. Bergamot was the one who'd stepped through the portal in the Precipice Shrine, aiming to go to the Dream Kingdom. Was it any surprise she woke up in a bed there? It made too much sense, in hindsight.
"This must be the castle!" Bergamot said, flinging the sheet off herself and rolling to her feet. Her high heels were lined up nicely on the side of the bed and she stopped to wrestle them on, hopping on one foot. "Where's Ruby? I was expecting tea and crumpets." She seemed to be misunderstanding what role the monarch held in this Kingdom. "I suppose she might be offline." Bergamot had traded DNA with the Dream Queen before, so she knew she wasn't just Mom's Little Helper NPC.
She propped the Cosmog Egg up on some pillows and looked around. She was in a sparsely-decorated room with stone walls, decorated with some renaissance-style art pieces. The bed was the only real sign of luxury. In fact, it was the only piece of furniture in the entire room.
I should be able to redecorate, shouldn't I? If she wasn't mistaken, a sufficiently powerful Psychic-Type could warp reality here.
"Egg, turn into Lunala!" Bergamot ordered, pointing at it commandingly.
The egg sat there, stars whirling softly around its shell.
"Just memeing. Ohoho." She lowered her hand, withdrawing a Pokeball instead. She actually did have a Psychic-Type at Tier 4 already. "Senga, I need some furniture. Make it happen, won't you?"
The female Meowstic appeared in a flash, wooden mallet cocked threateningly over her head. Seeing nothing to smash, she lowered the weapon and focused her power. Her ears stood up as shapes began to manifest in the room, shimmering into being one by one. A writing desk. A chair. A bookshelf, filled with books. A cabinet. A wardrobe.
"Stop! That's it!" Bergamot focused on the wardrobe, walking over to it. She threw open the doors. "Senga, can you put something in here for me?"
<What do you need?> the Meowstic asked, curious.
"The universe."
… "I always wanted to make a shrine in Ruby's closet," Bergamot said, sticking her head in to test the atmosphere. "A bit colder in the vacuum, Senga. I can barely feel the water in my eyeballs evaporating."
Once the wardrobe was finished, it would be like opening the airlock of a spacecraft, sucking the user through and ejecting them into the Eagle Nebula ('the universe' had been a bit too much for Senga to conceptualize, but a basic space landmark had seemed doable). Truly a delight. As a reluctant afterthought, Bergamot had Senga materialize a safety net to string across the entrance, so Ruby wouldn't be completely taken off guard if she went poking around in the guest room. "It's like a catio," she told the feline. "It's progressive."
The new shrine stood, ebony-finished wood with gleaming, gaudy gold handles and inlay. The doors were carved with what Morgana imagined alchemy diagrams to look like (probably just a modified human transmutation circle from a well-known anime) as well as an inscription:
MAKE THEM REGRET IT
"I told you before, right?" Bergamot said, holding the egg. An egg was like a wardrobe itself, in a way: untold potential waited inside. The only one who could know its contents was the one who'd put them there. "Creation is beautiful, and bitter. Life is suffering, and sublime. Loaned. Given to be taken."
Her eyes grew cold and dark as the Precipice Shrine.
"Are you sure you want to bother being born after all?"
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Bergamot Gristleborg
•
Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Aug 27, 2024 17:52:23 GMT 9
The forbidden colors made unpleasant after-images in her retinas. Bergamot blinked rapidly to try and erase them, enjoying their annoying effect on her vision. "There! See, wasn't that fun? Now, for the times…" She checked the stopwatch on her UI.
"Tut, tut. As expected, Team N00b are the l00sers," said Morgana, sighing dramatically. "By three-tenths of a second. Goodness, that sucks to be you. Here's your victory feast, winners! Catch!" Bergamot threw the winning team (Kyukon and Wolf) some PBJ's. "Those are $4 each, by the way. After the show is fine."
Sarah Lee had been oafishly clumsy as expected, but Alicia and Rose had been surprisingly deft at maneuvering the cheap Home Depot setup. The boy with the dolls, Kyukon, had also done well, and the humanoid Wolf had moved through the course with canine agility. Bergamot felt strangely proud of them for a moment.
She clapped her hands together. "Elimination time for N00bs! Where's my tiki torch…"
Morgana insisted on waiting until dark to do the elimination, so everyone had to go back to their camps (in the Corruption Zone and the Surge Steppes, respectively) to wait the 30+ minutes til sunset. In that time, Paw Wrangler went offline and never came back, so Morgana decided to just eliminate him instead of someone from Team N00b (making the entire previous challenge pointless).
"We gather here to mourn the passing of one of our own," Bergamot said back at The Divide, face lit by torchlight. Surrounded by the shapes of tombstones, it felt deliberately, deliberately like a funeral. Boom-boom. Gyarados played the bongos somberly.
"Paw Wrangler," she said solemnly, taking a (clearly) pre-prepared and pre-written piece of paper out of her pocket. She pretended to be addressing the clearly still AFK player. "You have been voted off the island. Take your belongings and go."
PAW HAS BEEN ELIMINATED! "Anyway, it's time for a team merger!" says Morgana. Survivor is progressing fast! "You are now united as one tribe. Team Apex N00b, return to your camp in Mistra. I think Zapdos found the other one. Did you try to disguise it at all?" Angry bird noises were coming from out in the Steppes.
The villainess twirled around, threatening to light things on fire with the torch she was still holding. "Have fun bonding! I'll message everyone when the next challenge is ready."
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Bergamot Gristleborg
•
Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Aug 25, 2024 10:26:26 GMT 9
STEEL CHEF: ROUND 3 THEME [steelchef]CXW9nv|d1-201-20
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Bergamot Gristleborg
•
Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Aug 22, 2024 16:28:25 GMT 9
This wasn't Morgana's first twisted celestial game show (though the inevitable twist had yet to come), and the starry shape of the so-called Dragon was strangely familiar. Almost as if she'd seen it before.
"Aha! I see Gyarados!" Bergamot said. She put both hands on her hips in order to strike a triumphant 'laughing pose.' "I have the perfect Pokemon! You dweebs shall never compare with me."
A few minutes later, Bergamot and her Gyarados, Rainbow, were rooting through the galactic pantry.
<How about these? They look tasty to me.>
Morgana came over to eye the massive worms her Gyarados had produced from somewhere in the seafood section. Their jaws were zip-tied shut like lobster claws, and their bodies were striped with virulent neon. They looked absolutely unpalatable to Morgana (though admittedly, she wasn't a giant fish. Maybe worms had some nostalgic value for the Gyarados, like food from its childhood or something). "Ugh," she said without thinking. "Do I have to boil these?"
<Well, they're pretty rubbery unless you cook them,> Rainbow offered, still looking hopeful. <The sulfur springs where you caught me back on Beta Island would do it in a flash. Or maybe even that bathtub you were using earlier would be enough.>
"True, but we need dessert, not a bisque," Morgana declared, standing back and surveying the ingredient shelf. An idea was percolating in her mind like bathwater. "Hold on," she said, closing her eyes reverently. "...I've got something."
It cannot be stated enough times that Chryssa had only rudimentary cooking experience, and a very limited palate to begin with. She'd never been exposed to a great diversity of foods. But a combination of insight into Rainbow's tastes (as a fellow overgrown fish) and the Dragon from Chanda Mama's Zodiac would have to be enough to make up for it, and she thought she had a good idea of what to bring.
"Dirt cups," she revealed dramatically.
<I don't know what that is.>
"Never mind, just find somewhere to put those worms where they can't climb out. We're not cooking them, they're perfect as they are."
While Rainbow wrestled the giant, colorful worms into a massive bowl, Bergamot mixed sugar and cocoa into her infinite supply of Milky Way yogurt, which would hopefully approximate chocolate pudding. By the time the Gyarados came back, the villainess was loading large, football-sized chunks of blackened rock into a mine cart. "Oh good, you're back. Crunch these up for me, will you?"
Rainbow carefully gripped the first rock in her jaws and bit down, increasing the pressure until darkness wreathed her four short fangs. The stone ruptured, crumbling away. To her surprise, it was hollow-- and sweet. <What are these?> she asked, biting down on another one until it fractured into smaller chunks. Tiny pieces of beryl and rare mineral deposits glimmered on the inside of the strange geode.
"I shan't say," declared Morgana, hiding the label that said Ore-O. "Keep crunching!"
Back in the Last Stone Standing dungeon, The Gyarados-themed constellation had showered its summoner in gems and riches. Perhaps this one had an eye for sparkly things, just like its storybook counterpart.
The Dragon constellation they were feeding was much larger than Rainbow, and the two of them had to struggle to put the massive dish together. A massive fishbowl became the dessert vessel, where the live gummy worms now burrowed through alternating layers of rich brown Milky Way pudding and sweet crushed ore. Facets of tiny gemstones caught the glowing worms' neon light through the glass, opalescent.
"Worm for the Wyrm," Bergamot declared. "I call it Cupoeira de la Dir't. Bon appetit!"
<What language is that?>
"Elven."
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Bergamot Gristleborg
•
Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Aug 13, 2024 6:29:01 GMT 9
The sound of distant bongo drums summons you back. A small Gyarados is playing them, bouncing up and down. Bergamot Riddle is recording a [tangent="Yes, the network asked me to be the host of Season 47 instead of Phil. Something to do with being an 'inspiration for young women everywhere'? Apparently they originally were going to offer the position to Sarah Lee, but ended up turning her down. She can't even be on camera without breaking out in hives. Of course I've seen them, they're all red and awful. Right, I know. I think it's all psychosomatic, but she refuses to see a specialist. I felt bad for her, of course, but this was my big break. Some people are just born winners, I always say!"]POV[/tangent] while she waits for both teams to show up.
As everyone arrives she stands up, abandoning the pretense of imaginary cameras. "It's time for our first challenge!" Bergamot announces. She's found a tiki torch somewhere, which is an improvement on the previous lack of atmosphere, but is still worrying considering the fire hazard and very dry, grassy plains. "Welcome, Team N00b." The Gyarados beats the drums. "Welcome, Team Guillotine Apex." More drums are beaten. "I hope you've finished scrounging and making fires or whatever, ohohoho!" Morgana hides her loud, obvious laugh behind her hand. "I've set up a fun obstacle course for all of you in the meanwhile."
The 'obstacle course' is what you might imagine one person and their Pokemon could make on a low budget: two long balance beams stretch above a shallow mud puddle with another Gyarados rolling in it like the world's laziest alligator. After the balance beams is a series of slippery stepping stones (repurposed from the tombstones) and a spike pit you apparently have to jump over.
"Chop chop, make two lines!" Your hostess shoos you over to the starting line, gesturing with the torch. "We'll go one at a time from each team, both you and your Pokemon. When one person on your team finishes, the next person can start, and so on. Best time wins!"
The course looks a bit precarious, but certainly not impossible.
"Also, you have to tape this optical illusion over your HUD while you're doing the course," Bergamot adds, producing a laminated sheet of paper with a horrible optical illusion on it. "I've heard you can see the Forbidden Colors if you focus on it long enough."
{EXAMPLE POST} "Ohoho, I'll go first!" Bergamot in this imaginary scenario where she was a contestant stepped up to the starting line, affixing the cool laminated image to her big forehead. She stared at the little X, willing the forbidden colors into her mind.
CHALLENGE START! Then she stepped off the line onto the balance beam. It wasn't too hard to keep her balance. She tiptoed along easily and then jumped off the end. Next waws the stepping stones made of tombstones. She jumped on ten of them or so and then continued on. There was a spike pit after that, which didn't scare her because it was a game and she wasn't going to die, though she woud certainly suffer some pain if she was impaled on spikes. ANyway, she put === her jogj=jee;ed sjoes off to the side and took a running leap over the pit. Then she finished with a flourish, completely un0muddified and uninjured.
END CHALLENGE! She had a wonderful time throughout and everyone clapped and cheered, then booed her afterwards out of sheer jealousy. Her Pokemon also followed her, because I forgot that part. She also saw 3 whole forbidden colors, which is more than most people see in a lifetime. You're welcome!
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Bergamot Gristleborg
•
Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Aug 11, 2024 14:37:48 GMT 9
Morgana reclined in the marble bathtub. She was clothed, of course, and not wet in the slightest thanks to her Swimmer ability.
"The water's just right, I think," she said. Steam rose off the surface. Her Sneasel, Mystique, peered over the far rim of the tub.
<What's that you've got there?>
"The universe," said Morgana, pulling it out of the water.
It didn't look like much. Half-translucent, almost smoky, like the embryo of an egg floating in a sea of white. It was currently in a mason jar.
<I don't think that's true,> said Mystique, doubtfully.
"Oh, fine, so I took some dramatic liberties. It's a galaxy, technically. Our galaxy. It's the Milky Way. Soon to be the Yogurt Way, if it stays at this temperature for a little longer. That's entropy for you." Bergamot put the bottle back under and clambered out of the bath, tossing her hair.
Chanda Mama had supplied every kind of ingredient to the Steel Chefs, from this world and beyond. That wasn't surprising. For someone as galaxy-brain as Chryssa Glasgow, the galaxy itself would naturally make an appearance in her subconscious's dairy section.
<Are we making yogurt?>
"Not quite. Come here, I need your nose."
Mystified, the Sneasel followed Morgana over to the prep station, where a spice rack was waiting. He had no idea why he'd been the one chosen out of all Morgana's Pokemon to assist her on this occasion.
"Well? What are you waiting for! Start sniffing," Morgana exclaimed, lifting the cat-weasel up and plopping it on the countertop. It flailed, claws scrabbling on the stainless steel.
<What do you mean?! I don't-- oh, I remember this one.> Mystique broke off, sniffing one of the spices. <Chaat masala?>
"We'll put that in, then." Morgana snatched it up and twirled around like a victorious ballerina. "Anything else?"
<Coriander seed?>
"And?"
<Ginger?>
"And?"
<These are all the spices from the market,> the Sneasel said out loud, realizing. <The one where you brought me back from the Everworld.>
"I've never been particularly into cooking," said Morgana. The spice bottles she'd collected clinked together like ice. She moved smoothly, purposefully. "But I enjoyed that trial. I thought I'd like to make something from it again." In real life, she'd never pull it off: but here, perhaps it was possible.
Once the villainess had collected all the spices, Sneasel's Odor Sleuth isolating each one, she twirled over to the pantry. Mystique followed her helplessly.
"Something the color of the sun," Bergamot said, handing a golden mango to Mystique to peel. He sliced it up dutifully with his claws like a grocery store deli worker as the villainess kept digging. "And the color of the moon." She handed a silver mango over next. The Sneasel did a double-take. <Is this one... okay?>
"Of course it is. It's just one of those GMOs, or something," Morgana laughed behind her hand, not concerned. "Now find me a blender!"
Fruit and ice whirled around in the appliance until it was a pale, frothy liquid, and Mystique fetched the finished Milky Way yogurt from the bath to add into the mix. It had become opaque and creamy, and tiny stars glimmered in the whey. Bergamot spooned it into the blender.
"Almost done!"
Morgana stood with her foot tapping, looking over the last two spices. They were both grinders, salt-and-pepper style. One was white, and labeled HUMAN LIFE.The other was black, and labeled HUMAN SUFFERING.
"Well this is difficult," she mused.
The Sun was the source of all life on earth: surely HUMAN LIFE would appeal to it. Chanda Mama was a trickster deity who derived great entertainment from messing with n00bs less fortunate than her: surely HUMAN SUFFERING would suit the spirit's palate.
A pinch of each wouldn't hurt, she decided, and finished adding the spices.
Before serving it to the judges, she put on her salvaged sunglasses from the Ostellia gas station and cracked open a little tub of pure light. She filled the two glasses each half full of brilliant white bubbles, which cooled to a warm, softly-glowing gold. "Just a healthy heaping of photons," she told Mystique, topping off each glass with the yogurt mixture. They shone like amber marbles at the bottom of a foamy, peach-colored drink, flickers of centuries-lost light glimmering within.
"I present my Mango Lassi, with hydrogen tapioca!" The villainess served it up on a solar platter. "Take a fucking sip, babes."
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Bergamot Gristleborg
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Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Aug 9, 2024 5:57:09 GMT 9
You meet on THE DIVIDE, a dusty old road that marks the border between Asper's Surge Steppes and the sinister Area 2 - Mistra to the north. Broken tombstones litter the path on both sides. Some might already bear your name.
"Hello, everyone! Watch out for pestilent Zapdos," A smug-looking young woman in a blue dress greets participants, seeming in high spirits. She's surely thrilled to be getting so much attention. "He hates when people are snooping around so close to the border. It's like he has no respect for reality television!"
Once you're all assembled, Bergamot balances up on top of a tombstone and snaps her fingers for attention. "All right, so I assume you all know how this works! Two teams, you build a camp and forage for food, we come back to do a challenge together, and someone gets voted off the island. We'll do all that, but faster, because I don't want to be stuck here with all of you that long." It's nice to know Morgana is already anticipating becoming bored of her own reality show knockoff.
"So: teams!"
She scans the sea (more like small pond) of faces, assessing you carefully. "All right!" she announces, apparently having come to a decision, "Sarah Lee, Rose Garden, Alicia Westfield, you will be Team N00b! Here's your team flag." She hands you a flag with a Piplup. She looks at the other three players: Kyukon, Wolf, and Paw Wrangler. "The rest of you will be Team Guillotine Apex! I've also made you a flag." She gives you an almost-identical flag, also with a Piplup. "Team Guillotine Apex, you'll be building your camp here in the Surge Steppes, over by Tinymon Town. Team N00b, you'll be over on the Mistra side instead. I haven't spent much time there, but I'm sure there's roots and berries and things to eat if you look carefully. Oh, one more thing!" Morgana fishes in her inventory and pulls out a [tangent=Immunity Idol (item): a chibified plastic likeness of Morgana. It looks like one of those figurines from your animes. ]small plastic figurine.[/tangent] "I noticed there's a glitch if you click and drag your player icon into the overworld. It just makes these," said Morgana, chucking the doll into the bushes on the Mistra side. "Anyway, that's an immunity idol, so go get it! If you have one you won't die at the first checkpoint, so that should be your first priority! And making a camp, fire, shelter, and so on. You're going to need to survive at least one night out here. Anyway, meet me back here when you're done, and we'll do the first challenge."
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Bergamot Gristleborg
•
Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Aug 9, 2024 5:24:39 GMT 9
This will be starting soon! My internet (from vacation) has been extremely spotty, so reply windows may be a bit wider than 48 hours. More people can still join once we start, just show up in the thread and invite yourself into one of the groups. Thanks everyone for your interest! UPDATE: the thread has started! unovr.boards.net/thread/2866/ti-scenario-survivor-unovr
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Bergamot Gristleborg
•
Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Aug 2, 2024 1:04:34 GMT 9
{OUTWIT - OUTPLAY - OUTLAST} This scenario (run in-character by Bergamot Gristleborg) will attempt to capture the spirit of the reality show survivor in 5 Posting Cycles. Players will be divided into two teams, who will both build a separate camp and compete for resources via challenges, and... yeah, challenges.
This will be very informal (I'll essentially be running it from mobile while I'm on vacation). There will be loose 48-hour windows between cycles to keep up the momentum, but I can grant extensions if you send me a message on the forum.
This is a player scenario, not an explicit game event! That means Morgana is running and organizing it in-character, the same way you would if you wanted to play low-budget Survivor at a friend's birthday party. Expect the ruling system to be SUPREMELY UNFAIR and the challenges to be UNDERWHELMING.
You do not need to know Survivor to participate (it's funnier if you don't). You will need to work with teammates in-character and may very well be voted off the island early via Morgana's biased elimination system, so not everyone will make it to Cycle 5. Expect humor and high lethality.
Anyway, sign up here! I'd like to start this pretty soon, so once I have, say, 6 interested characters...? I might let people join late too.
NAME: @you POKEMON: pick one ARE YOU A N00B?: yes or no
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Bergamot Gristleborg
•
Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Aug 1, 2024 20:14:19 GMT 9
"O-hohohoho!"
Morgana twirled in, pirouetting on one foot like a smug glass ballerina. A Mudkip followed on her heels, hound-like, peeping nervously at the 'No Dogs Allowed' sign on the gate.
Marill, Marill, as far as the eye could see. The little mouse Pokemon's ears twitched, sensing danger, and the rodents began to roll and toddle away as quickly as they could. "Oh no you don't," Morgana said, wobbling as she came out her spin. "We have dibs on this one! Jack, do the thing!"
"Peep peep?" Jack asked, tilting his fishy head to the side.
"Yes, THE the thing," Bergamot answered exasperatedly, flipping her hair. She obviously had Pokemon Speech turned on. "Go on, use DUAL WINGBEAT!"
The little mudfish focused, with some trepidation. Then the shadows beneath his body seemed to bend and arch, rising up off the ground in the shape of two huge, fiery wings. The shapes of dark flames wiggled and jumped, evoking the rainbow feathers of Moltres herself. With two powerful strokes, the shadows beat, blasting a Marill off its feet and sending it rolling straight towards Morgana, who caught it under one high heel like a soccer player receiving an easy pass.
"See? Easy peasy," she said as the sinister wings retreated back inside the Mudkip, folding themselves up neatly again inside the starter's shadow. "Oh Zamazentaaa! I have a new ball for youuu!"
NEXT PROMPT (63): [Tower]UpMAuPlo1-501-50
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Bergamot Gristleborg
•
Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Jul 29, 2024 22:33:27 GMT 9
The doorknob rattled and wrenched, and the office door flew open. But it was neither catboy nor catmafia boss: it was a rude woman in a blue dress, who slammed the door shut behind her and exclaimed "You there! N00b! Quick, trade me, I have to get rid of these goods."
The catboys hadn't been easy to lose, but Morgana was fleet of foot and her high-heeled Running Shoes always ran true. A little momentary Aviator equip and she'd gone sailing over the barbed wire fence with a hip, skop and probably a jimp or jomp as well. "Try to climb that!" she'd called airily behind her before hiking up her skirts and running upstairs, further into the abandoned depot.
Morgana could tell Torino was no NPC-- she was far too fancy and out of place in their current setting. "Don't worry, you can trust me." She pointed at her head, then repeated "No ears," as if that should make it obvious. "What do you want, Pokémon? How about an Onix?" What had she been thinking when she'd traded for the rock snake to begin with? It would never be Celine Dionyx, and no evil soul-transfusing ritual would bring the celebrity back. She hadn't tried, admittedly.
"You have to take this too," she added, equipping the Keggling to the Onix in her inventory and initiating the trade request. "Don't let that Dr. Bunya or the kibble dealers get their paws on it! I'm saving it for a prank." The half-feline, half-scorpion PokePet gave a threatening hiss from inside its jar before Morgana shoved it Torino's way. "Well? What are you waiting for: accept already!"
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Bergamot Gristleborg
•
Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Jul 27, 2024 13:08:01 GMT 9
Some people wondered why Morgana had joined Mythstar. Surely a villainess (even a self-proclaimed one) belonged in the Creed with similarly cool, edgy, evil (?) characters. Amusing as the idea was of rubbing elbows with edgelords, pretending to be the same kind of high-stakes power gamer, Bergamot knew she'd get tired of it. Though perhaps disappointing other players who took her more seriously than she deserved was its own type of villainy. Interesting. I'll have to think about that. She wouldn't mind a username color change. But the real reason she'd joined Mythstar was simply because, at the end of the day, it suited Chryssa best. Far horizons. Testing her limits. Buying into story, unraveling legends. Actually, based on the Guild Descriptions perhaps she should have joined Round 2 for social players, as more than anything else Chryssa played for the captive audience. Anyway, she was still here and still in Mythstar, so it was time to pay Cygnus a visit. "Are you in here, old man?" Morgana asked, popping her head in the door. "I'm here to collect the 'star'. The Mythstar. I was promised one when I joined and I am sorely disappointed." She came in the rest of the way, holding out a white-gloved hand expectantly. "Just think of it as a... oh, what do you call it when someone shows up at a store or a restaurant and asks for all the money in the register? A holdup? That sounds awfully old-timey, but I suppose you'd like that."She lowered her hand after a moment, giving an annoyed hair flip. "But I suppose if you insist on sacrificing your own body to prevent me from stealing Staryu, I can offer a trade," she said after a moment. She didn't seem too disappointed, as if she hadn't expected it to work. "...A Mareep, then?" She couldn't even remember how she'd gotten it. Offering MAREEP for STARYU
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Bergamot Gristleborg
•
Muddy Girl
Mythstar
Posts: 391
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Chryssa Glasgow
OOC Username: M00K
Arena Points: 37
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Post by Bergamot Gristleborg on Jul 26, 2024 19:09:05 GMT 9
#s://a~l3n~co/i/4IuJtM~png Bergamot Gristleborg stood on the precipice, like so many who had come before her. The gulf yawned like an empty eye socket, black as ice across a frozen lake. Dark as always, save for the faint, soap-bubble sheen that marked the entrance portal to the Dream World. "If we wait for night, the stars will be reflected on the surface," Bergamot said to the egg. "...or maybe not. I came here in winter last time, and I suppose that doesn't happen anymore." Not since the Endless Night had lifted. How many years had it been now since that fateful solstice? The egg was not in her arms like an infant, but sitting on the ground next to her. Some might say as equals. Some might say it was more like a spare suitcase. Its blueish surface was obscured at the moment, though there were times whole galaxies spiraled across the shell. A few white specks peeked out as the villainess watched, as if stars were just appearing through a gap in the clouds. Morgana knew that there was a different world in the Precipice Shrine's belly, a world she had once descended into on a staircase carved of stone. A world, or maybe the absence of one. Wasn't that what a dungeon was? A perfect alignment, a once-in-a-lifetime chance never to occur again. During the event they had unlocked a "bonus round", a Wheel of Fortune as brutal as it was bountiful. They had torn stars from their companions to make that dream a reality. One prize door on the wheel had never opened-- since UNOVRCon, the rumor was that that unclaimed Cosmog had been the one who got away. She touched her lips. She'd tasted starfire, and heartsblood. She'd slain Celine for a chance at escape, torn out the last light in her eyes, and the celebrity had still sacrificed herself to save her. Go on, she'd said. "I suppose it's time for a lecture," Bergamot said. She was strangely subdued, as she often was when she was by herself. No Pokémon. No audience. Just herself, the void, and The Egg. "You're from this place, in a way. I suppose we both escaped, and that makes us connected.""But people died to get me out. Your conscience is clear." The villainess didn't budge. She didn't close her eyes. Her gaze was steady, flintlike. "She was just a celebrity Pokemon pun made of metaphorical stardust. But she's gone, and I'm still here."Saying "it's just a game" now rang false in every way. Why was that where she should draw the line? Just because Celine Dionyx wasn't hers, wasn't even a distinct Pokémon NPC? Because she was probably just a redundant part of her subconscious taken shape? Was that any reason not to still be shaken, more than a year after she'd felt the world fade to black and died in UNOVR for the first time? Chryssa didn't believe in any one reality. All other lives were equally insignificant to her. Expendable. Sacrificial. People, Players, NPCs, Pokemon, apparitions, plot devices. The only thing she could know was real was her own experience--perhaps that's why she valued her life so intensely. It was also the reason she tested it so rigorously. When you wanted to know where your world ended and another's began, you had to push your consciousness to its limit. "Do you want to go?"Her voice was quiet. Hard. Eyes gray as ghosts, as stone, as fading starlight. The cheerful pink flowers that ringed the Precipice Shrine had grown cold and still as granite, their colors paled. Petrified. Like skipping a stone across a pond, she moved; first a step, then as raindrops on pavement, one after another. She knew no Starcatch waited for her and the egg on the other side, no other universe, no secret dungeon. Only a kingdom of dreams, ruled by a bird with a beard and the game's little sister. But how different could they be?
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