M00K
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Retired
Posts: 58
OOC Username: M00K
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Post by M00K on May 7, 2023 23:56:37 GMT 9
CYCLE 5: QUAIL BE QUINTESSENCE"Ha... ha... ha..." says the warlock at the top of the tower.
"This is bad, guys!" cries woodblock, your friend and fellow player who's definitely been here the whole time. She rattles the bars of her prison. "I've been captured by the warlock, and he's got four of my quails!"
"Silence!" commands the warlock, making a cool Darth Vader gesture and causing the kimono girl's words to cut off in her throat. "It's time for you to make your usefulness known."
Evil chanting spills from the dark magician's lips like putrid water. This is all happening so quickly you haven't had much time to orient yourselves, but the ominous magic circle on the floorboards finally lights up the room enough for you to see what you're dealing with.
Cages. Cages and cages of sad quails, each of them separated into perfectly-spaced grid rows and columns like the alien prisoners in Lilo and Stitch. Pidgey, Rookidee, Fletchling, Wattrel...
Waitâ these areâ they couldn't possibly beâ
Your missing quails perk up at the sight of you and begin to jump and flutter, overjoyed.
Boing! Boing! Boing! "Peep! Peep! Peep!"
As woodblock dies in the background, her fifth quail appears in the cage next to the others in a swirl of purple flames. A magic binding appears around the five of them and some kind of energy seems to leach from their bodies, pooling and collecting in a small glass vial.
"The purest form of magic. The fifth elementâ" whispers the warlock triumphantly, holding up the little bottle. "Quintessence. Harvested from the beating hearts of quails, and other things that begin with q. But there aren't very many of those." His eyes narrow, menacing. "Five are required for the ritual to work."
It is now that your purpose has become clear.
"Give me the quails," hisses the warlock. An invisible wind ruffles his robes as he floats into the air, eyes glowing, bottle of Quintessence still clutched in one hand. "My armies have this tower surroundedâ there is no escape. Give me the quails, and I will spare you the agony of five fresh deaths."
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Kath Ulu
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Hard Mode Survivor
Round 2
Posts: 171
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Heather West
OOC Username: kathulu
Arena Points: 10
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Post by Kath Ulu on May 8, 2023 10:10:06 GMT 9
Kath Ulu stepped happily to the side to let her fellow beleaguered players out of the elevator.
As the warlock spoke, Kath loudly yawned, theatrically stretched her arms, and closed her hand over and over to indicate that he was talking too much. She wasn't worried about this numpty. Not after everything she hadn't been through!
She turned to her fellow players, all missing at least one quail, and said without a shred of irony:
"I want you all to know," she said. "I still have all five of my quails. So I'm doing this for you."
"That's right!" First Lieutenant Piper cried happily. "The Captain's seen us all the way through without a single casualty!"
"I can't believe it!" "Never punished!" "What the fuck?" "We're alive!"
Kath's Quails stepped up to the warlock, chirping and flexing their tiny muscles.
Boing! Boing! Boing!
Peep! Peep! Peep!
"That's right," said Kath. "It's time for this warlock to get war-unlocked!"
The PIKIPEK's hid their faces, terribly embarrassed.
"All we have to do," Kath said, her logical impeccable, her will unstoppable, "is RUN AWAY!"
"What?" "Huh?" "We're gonna die." "Is she crazy?"
"Um, Captain..."
"All we've done all day," Kath said, convinced of her own ridiculousness, "is run toward this idiot. I bet if we run away, all his plans will fall apart!"
"We literally cannot do that."
"Oh. What were our other options?"
Piper grinned. "I'm glad you asked! I think his weakness is numbers less than five!"
Kath's face was completely blank.
"He wants five quails, Captain! I bet he wants five of everything else, too! I bet he's afraid of things being in quarters."
First Lieutenant Piper flew across the room and landed on the warlocks hand.
"Hey!" Said the warlock.
"Observe!" Piper shouted. "Watch what happens when he only has a four fingers, instead of five!"
The dutiful Pikipek PECKED the warlock's thumbs with such intensity and severity that each of them popped off!
"AHHH!"
"Hey, that works!" Kath said happily. "Nice. Guess his weakness was he can't do much without his thumbs."
Piper flew back to Kath and high-fived with her wing.
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Lord Darien Blackthorne
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Weekend Warrior
Player Character
Posts: 118
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Sae Endicott
OOC Username: spibe
Arena Points: 72
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Post by Lord Darien Blackthorne on May 9, 2023 13:28:18 GMT 9
Blackthorne was, to his utmost horror, getting used to all of it. Dying, coming back, and running from the horde. It was rote, in a way he'd probably have to address via some mindfulness later.
At the top of the tower with the others, he listened, eyes scanning the room. There were the cages of wuails, natually, and the magic circle on the ground, but also plenty of other stereotypically "evil wizard" things. Staves and tomes and skulls, and the like. Maybe...
Kath stepped forward first, and... simply ripped off his thumbs. Blackthorne winced. While, yes, there were plenty of similar games also showing injuries, it... felt squicky to him, in a way.
But the warlock was still standing, glaring at them all, and Blackthorne felt he had to act. "There's only one class who drains the life of others! You aren't a warlock, but a lich instead!" He accused, sweeping his arm dramatically.
Blackthorne moved, keeping his eyes on the self-professed warlock. "And a lich's weakness is true- Something they keep watchful eye on, near and dear to them-" Nestled in a bookcase between reagents was a quaint reliquailry which Blackthorne retrieved. Still facing the lich, he opened it, displaying the quality quail phylactery inside.
The warlock let out a scream, reaching forwards- as Blackthorne simply dropped both, letting the quality quail phylactery fall to the ground, and shatter.
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Sarah Lee
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Soldier, Poet, King
The Creed
Posts: 483
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Barack Orama
OOC Username: Ladybug
Arena Points: 35
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Post by Sarah Lee on May 9, 2023 23:34:14 GMT 9
"He needs sets of five Quails! Quick everyone, the five of us need to get out of here before-" Sarah stopped. The five of them. They'd battled their way here, drawn right into the gaping jaws of death by a few simple quest prompts.
"It's us," she said quietly, looking the final boss in his quivering eyes. "The Quails were always going to end up here. They were always expendable! Just tools meant to draw us here. We're the ones you really want! The QUESTERS!"
Five players on the journey. Five quails for each of them. Five quandaries for them to overcome. Five members in the band Queen. Five qualities in this queue of quintessential quintuplets.
Wait. There were only four members in Queen! And if that was true then this questionable quack's whole quail quintessence quest may just be one quick set of questions from being quashed.
"Tell me Warlock. Why do you even need Quintessence? I see no evidence of you having mastered the first four elements, so shouldn't it just be Monossense?" she said querulously.
Sarah's Quails peeped in agreement.
"It's clear from your plan that you derive your power from sets of five. Five Questers with five Quails. A Devil's Quintet." She shook her head in disgust, and then locked eyes with the warlock. "And yet...you lost the moment our journey started."
Sarah pointed quixotically at the corpse of woodblock. "You killed poor Woodblock. A tragedy to be sure, but she was the sixth member of our group. Six Questers and thirty Quails! What's that? That's nothing! Thematically void of meaning. She was your spare!"
"And now there are five of us," she continued, pointing at her four friends. "If you kill one of us then you're down to four! You've lost all leverage!"
"OoooOoOoOooOo!" peeped Sarah's Quails.
"You need beating hearts?" she asked, striding towards the dark mage like a manager approaching the service desk four minutes before closing. "Then what's to stop me quashing this plan the old fashioned way?" She rolled up her sleeves, ready to quarrel with the queasy quack until her quarry was in quarters.
"What are you going to do?" she quipped "Kill me?"
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Kazuki
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You Can't Take Me
The Creed
Posts: 883
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Himura Atsushi
OOC Username: Sleepy
Arena Points: 113
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Post by Kazuki on May 10, 2023 6:48:01 GMT 9
After getting crushed to death on a flying carpet, Kazuki joins the rest of the party at the elevator, immediately greeted by an extensive cutscene at the top of the tower that involved quail revival, the secret sixth player, and a ritual sacrifice. The team so far has answered by ripping off the warlockâs thumbs and destroying his prized unholy artifact, with the current player engaging in an inspirational roast session.
âWhat?â Kazuki asks as one of his fletchling comes to flutter by his ear.
<Iâve spoken to our missing duet! They know of a weakness! And we have hatched a plan,> the quail twitters gently, which Kazuki strains to hear over the queue of quelling quicksilver quotes. Uninterrupted, the fletchling continues, detailing the plot.
âThat is the stupidest thing Iâve ever heard.â But compared to everything thatâs happened? âIâm in.â
As Sarah Lee is having her quarrel with the quibbler, two fletchling fly up and rip the spooky tapestries from the walls. The heavy fabric drapes over the distracted warlock, at which point Kazuki launches a synchronized attack with his three free quails.
âHold still, Thumbelina!â Kazuki cackles, restraining the flailing warlock as his quails make use of their brandished beaks, slicing the fabric as masterfully as Wiley does to human flesh. âHow are you supposed to experience the purest form of magic without getting properly dressed?â
By the end of it, the warlock breaks out, and stares down at himself aghast. âWhat is the meaning of this?!â His majestic robes! Theyâve been transformed into a gown, the shredded tapestry forming floor-length frills. Even his wizard slippers have been replacedâwith a pair of geta looted from woodblockâs corpse.
Kazuki grabs the warlock and pulls him into the closed position, grinning like a maniac. All of his fletchling, in and out of the cages, start to sing, filling the tower with a tinny, pop-filled tune that inspires the feet of teen girls everywhere. With the combined might of his own gorilla grip and the warlockâs complete inability to move and thus blast his head from his shoulders, Kazuki waltzes.
âAs your surrogate father, Iâm going to do what your actual dad never did and say Iâm proud of you.â Kazuki leaves no room to answer, dancing with little consideration for the warlockâs ankles. He waltzes as if evading a field of hidden geyser mines. âNow letâs end this QUINCE with a bang!â
He spins the warlock, wrapping him in his own gown. He keeps his grip tight, remembering how he braced against the wild carpet as he careened through the sky. And then he yanks, launching the bastard Beyblade-style.
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Taylor
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Lone Wolf
Mythstar
Posts: 491
Trainer Class:
Player Name: Taylor Finch
OOC Username: Lea
Arena Points: 72
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Post by Taylor on May 10, 2023 23:48:08 GMT 9
Well.
She hadnât failed on every decision. Just almost every one. The flying carpet did unfortunately turn out to be one of the lethal choices, and yet again, Taylor lost one of her chicks. With a world-weary sigh, she checked the global chat to see which route was safe.
âOkay, the elevator it is,â she sighed, making her way over there now. âGetting real tired of dying now, yâknow!â This last was shouted grouchily at the sky. Peeping from her shoulder punctuated her words as though backing her up. But if so, would it sound so cheerful? The tone was all off!
At the top of the tower (and seemingly at their destination at last, if the map marker was to be believed), they found a warlock. Or a lich, if Darian was to be believed. Taylor hung back, waiting for most of the other players to make their moves first, as she had this whole time. It wasnât hesitance as such, but rather a case of taking the time to think.
When the cages of birds appeared, she breathed a sigh of relief to see that the rest of her little flock still lived, before frowning at the warlock as he unveiled his plan. She should probably be scowling in outrage, but instead, she was simply annoyed at the vagueness of his plan.
âIs that it?â She spoke up finally, once quiet fell. âThatâs your whole plan?â It was quite apparent from her tone that she was unimpressed. âWhat the hell kind of scientific method is this?â Itâs⌠not, Taylor. Itâs a BBEGâs dastardly plan. Still, there needs to be order to these things.
âWhat precisely is your hypothesis here?â She barked, stepping forwards to take her turn, the discomfort the warlock had shown during Sarah Leeâs speech having given her an idea. âYou may preach âmagicâ all you wish, sir, but is magic not another form of science?â She certainly hoped so, or this was all going to be a crock of shit.
âWhat are your variables here?â She snapped, continuing on before the warlock could do much more than splutter in protest. âWhere are your controls? So far, I see none â whatâs to stop outside influence altering your data? Hell, youâve had a whole new character added seemingly without notice â itâs a shambles!â With this, she gestures to Woodblockâs cage.
âI must admit,â she announced, eyes narrowing to exceedingly unimpressed slits. âI fail to see how your plan stands up to any sort of questioning.â She made a show of shaking her head, an expression of disgust on her face. âItâs appears sloppy and thrown together without thought for ethics, context or scientific method.â She throws her hands in the air. âHell, where are your sources? Your own hubris currently seems to be the only one cited! A disgrace!â Standing a little straighter, she crosses her arms over her chest. âYou insult this group assembled here today and when you look back on this, I hope you find yourself quite ashamed.â
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M00K
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Retired
Posts: 58
OOC Username: M00K
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Post by M00K on May 17, 2023 13:42:16 GMT 9
EPILOGUE: QUAIL BE QUINTESSENTIAL"No! Not my thumbs!" shouts the warlock as Kath Ulu 's quails piki-peck them off. "I need those to do magic! They're an essential digit!"
He reaches out thumblessly, but not in time to stop Lord Darien Blackthorne from dropping his precious phyllactery on the ground. It shatters. "No! My quail quality phyllactery!" he screams. "I need that to maintain eternal life! Curse you, curse you!"
His confidence wavers as Sarah Lee throws shade, calling his bluff. "Very clever," he hisses, realizing he got too greedy by killing your definitely-real-friend woodblock solely for the purpose of demonstrating how the quintessence harvest worked. "But I'll have you know it's all part of my... wait! Stop that! Put those back!"
The warlock makes a late grab for his spooky tapestries before being spontaneously swaddled in them. Quails buzz in synchronized slashes around him, tailoring the impromptu dress like the birds in Snow White or maybe more like the mice in Cinderella. "What in fresh quell is this?!" the gown-wearing warlock shouts over the quinceanera music, struggling feebly in Kazuki 's brutal dance grip.
His struggles grow even weaker under Taylor's targeted questioning. "My magic is... beyond your foolish comprehension," he says, gulping visibly, "Quintessence is... everything. Quintessence is... anything. Quintessence is... is..."
The warlock is unraveled all at once like a giant turban and, with a mighty tug from Kazuki , goes flying out the window. His last words fade from your ears, growing tiny and distant.
"Quintessenceeeeee!"
A short while later, the townspeople begin to chant and cheer.
Hail, hail, the quail! Boing! Boing! Boing! Hail, hail, the quail! Peep! Peep! Peep! Stellar quail impressions break out all around the city as its residents rejoice. The armies of darkness flee at long last, their dark master slain. And you reunite with your missing quails, some of whom might even like to join you on your journey!
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